My son was about 5 years old and he has ADHD. My friend (no kids) came over to hang out. So son's playing on the floor with action figures, making noises and acting out big adventures.

She turns to me and says "Jesus Christ, can't you shut him up? He's freaking obnoxious." I said "See that door over there? Walk through it and don't let it hit you on your way out".

She said she couldn't believe I would end a 30 year friendship over a kid. But she walked out and we never spoke again.

Met a girl online who I was supposed to meet up with a couple times but our communication would get weird whenever we tried to link. She’d told me where she stayed and it was always kind of weird to me that I couldn’t picture that block when I grew up nearby. We lose contact officially. About a month or two goes by. I’m riding down the street drunk af one night and as we pass the area she said she lived in, I realized I could never picture her block because it was the entrance to a cemetery.

I watched a thylacine (Tasmanian tiger) walking across my rural property in Northern California 15 years ago. 50 feet away, very clear view of it for a couple of minutes. They’ve allegedly been extinct since 1940, and have never lived on the North American continent. But I know what I saw.

One that surprised a lot of women I've dated: most guys almost never get random compliments. So when someone says 'nice shirt' or 'you look good today,' we remember it for years like it was an award ceremony.

When Elvis died, he probably had about 30-40lbs of waste in his colon. He was severely constipated & had about 4-5 months of compacted fecal matter in his colon.

When Quentin t tried to roast that one riddler actor and everyone on X told him to basically F off.