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There are plenty of things women have to put up with that they really shouldn’t have to, and sexist comments are definitely one of them. They come from strangers, coworkers, even family members. And it’s always, always the same lines.
You know the ones. “Get in the kitchen.” “Make me a sandwich.” Cue the sigh and the eyeroll. So when one Redditor asked women to share their favorite responses to these tired remarks, we had to round up the best ones. Scroll down to read them all.
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#1
Australian Jade Hameister is the youngest person to have pulled off a Polar Hat Trick by traversing the North Pole, South Pole, and Greenland ice sheet. She had multiple boys telling her to get in the kitchen and make her a sandwich. She captioned a post on Instagram “I made you a sandwich (ham & cheese), now ski 37 days and 600km to the South Pole and you can eat it.”
Teach your daughter to ignore them and focus on becoming radically successful at something, and the comebacks will write themselves.
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#2
Are you... too dumb to make your own sandwich?
#3
I had an online friend in my late teens who would make comments about women in the kitchen and making sandwiches. Not sure why I let it slide for so long but at some point I got annoyed and asked him,
Me: “you know what they call guys who make jokes about women in the kitchen?”
Friend “?”
Me: “single”
Didn't hear those comments from him after that.
#4
I’d just send a YouTube meant for small children on how to make a sandwich, since he obviously needs some remedial instruction.
LizzieBoredom 5 hours ago
I'm always surprised he only asks for a sandwich. Not homemade cheesecake? Not lobster bisque? I'm not making any of it, I'm just surprised.
#5
Comebacks are about engaging in a battle of wits to beat the other person at their own game. The problem is that you can't beat a misogynist because their "game" is basically, "haha, I don't consider you to be a human being." I would focus on teaching your step daughter that she is too valuable to waste her energy on people who don't respect her. Whatever she once felt for this boy, he isn't the person she thought he was. She should block him and never give him the time of day, even if he tries to apologize or claims he was only joking later.
It's a very valuable lesson to teach young girls that when someone shows you who they are, you need to believe them. If she gives him a second chance, she is teaching him she will tolerate being treated like garbage.
#6
A fun thing to do when someone makes a sexist “joke” is to act like you don’t get it or didn’t hear the first time, and ask them to repeat it.
Man: make stupid sexist comment
Me: “what? I don’t get it”
Man: “uhhh…(tries to find way to explain why he’s a jerk)”.
#7
"Oh no, is your babysitter off this week? You poor thing. Do you need help tying your shoes as well?"
#8
Had a "kid" (12 years old maybe?) harass my gaming buddies one day. Little [jerk] was just whipping out the insults and more and the voice admin wasn't on to kick him. Nor were a mod. After tormenting the other gamer girl in the channel, he turned his target on me and told me to go to the kitchen and make him a sandwich.
"You don't want me to go to the kitchen, little boy, that's where all the *knives* are."
That shut him up for a couple of minutes and the cheers from the guys were great. By then the voice channel admin got on and got rid of him.
Bartlet for world domination 16 hours ago
Oh that's very close to mine: Still not allowed near the knives, are you?
#9
"Sorry, but I am way too young to be a mom."
#10
Slap one piece of bread on each of his ears and declare "you're a sandwich."
#11
If you can't even make a sandwich, what else can't you do?
#12
My response to “make me a sandwich” is “I’m not that kind of witch. You’ll have to stay a guy.”
#13
There was a female gamer that dealt with something like this. She told him "how about I [sleep with] your dad and give him a son he actually loves." lmao your daughter is only 13, so that's not recommended but it was hilarious nonetheless.
#14
A 13 year old would understand the response: “sounds like a skill issue.”
#16
Oh, I thought I liked you. Thanks for showing me that you’re not my type.
Roxy222uk 11 hours ago
Genuinely, considering his youth, I think it would be worth saying that she had liked him before that comment. He’s trying out stuff he’s picked up on line, and young teens really are just trying stuff out, sometimes quite idiotic stuff. It might have an impact, whereas a man in his thirties has made a decision to behave like that knowing all its ramifications.
#17
She doesn’t need a comeback. She needs to say “that’s disrespectful and gross, I’m not wasting any more of my time with you”.
#18
“Do you need me to fix your diapers as well.”
#19
Take a cue from Kamala Harris when her opponent tries to say something demeaning or insulting to drag her down to his level. Don't engage with it. Arguing back against an insult like that means accepting his premise that your value and your humanity is something that can be debated. It isn't. You have to reject that entire idea by ignoring it and ignoring him. He doesn't get any more time, effort, or attention. (Because what do you gain by winning this argument, even if you could win it? It only gives him attention and validation.)
This boy did you a favor. He showed you who he is. And now you don't have to waste any more time or energy thinking about him as a possible crush.
Ali 10 hours ago
That advice is ok for men, not really for boys. Let's not forget, she is going to be in class rooms with him for years to come, why is anyone still giving girls this message? Like they are somehow stronger and more mature for ignoring it? Arguing with him could change his mind, because he is a little boy not a grown man with entrenched misogyny. Ignoring toxic language from a child might validate that it is ok to use those words, which allows them normalises it. Negative attention from peers is useful for young minds working themselves out, and stop telling girls to be the bigger person and let it go!
#20
Never speak to him again. That’s the comeback. Someone like this does not deserve another second of her time.
#23
The best thing you can teach your daughter to do in these situations is to treat the boy saying these stupid things as utterly insignificant.
There is no reason for her to feel hurt by these comments because they say absolutely nothing about who she is or the value she brings to the people around her. Those comments quite literally have nothing to do with her and she needs to learn to treat them as such.
I highly recommend responding with "well that's a weird thing to say..." as it identifies that it is a stupid comment but also makes it clear that the only person in the interaction who looks stupid is him.
Treat it as a stupid comment that makes the person saying it look stupid, because that's genuinely what it is. These boys are not worth her attention so don't give it to them.
I totally understand that it is annoying behaviour and it is completely normal for her to find it frustrating, but she will be best served by not letting on that it bothers her. The fact is that she *is* better than them, so she should act like it by simply not giving them her energy or attention.
Clara Williams 2 hours ago
This is what I have done! I ask, "Why would you say that? That's so weird/gross/etc."
#24
Refer him to the Home Economics or Food Science teacher, since no one at home has bothered to teach him how to take care of himself.
#26
Pretend like you don’t understand what he means and have him explain it. If he says it’s a joke, have him explain what’s funny about it. Aren’t jokes supposed to be funny? And then of course never speak to him again and warn all your girlies.
#27
Well I'm a Scorpio so I have a knack for destroying people completely by understanding their insecurities and having no qualms about using that against them to knock them down if they give me any [nonsense]. So if she wants to go scorched earth, the best way to do it is to mock them using things we *know* misogynistic men and boys are extremely insecure about. Eg. "get some biceps and I'll think about it" or "you're not tall enough to deserve a sandwich".
When I was in film school, an irritating little man kept making sexist comments like this to me in class, hoping for clout with the guys. I was one of two women in a class of 16, so it was extra irritating. One day, while we were doing a camera test and my role was acting as DOP, I asked him to do something normal related to the shot. He said "shave your legs woman, then you can talk to me". I clapped back "I can shave my legs whenever I want but that's as tall as you're ever gonna get", the dudes all laughed, and the little [jerk] never even LOOKED at me again, let alone sass me.
Scorched earth, sister. Only way to go.
#28
“Why, are your parents not feeding you? Should I call cps?” Realistically, what she should do is not waste her time on this idiot. Her rejection can help him learn.
#29
"You've had 13 years (or whatever his age is) to come up with a better insult but instead copied one that's been around longer than you have been alive. I can see why you need help making a simple sandwich."
#30
Sounds like she should send that text to every girl in school. Maybe make posters, with his photo by the quote.
#32
"Next!" then look past him as if you're looking for someone else. Do not engage with him again.
#33
Block his number and move on. Thank her lucky stars he showed who he really was early on.
#34
Couple of different responses depending on whether this is in person or via text and how threatening she wants to be!
1. Send a link to Lily Singh's how to make a sandwich video. Tutorial and a burn all in one
2. Have a blank face and then slowly let it become a sickly sweet smile and either simply say "okay" all cheerfully or if they're slow drive it home with "you can totally trust me with your food!!" all with a sweet sweet smile and a nice tone of voice- scares 'em every time
3. Let your face show how stupid you find what they just said and then just hold that expression. Keeping holding it. Hold it until they start falling over themselves to retract their statement. You can hasten it by saying words like: wow, ick, yikes, pass, ew (my fave)
4. Build me a house, cut down a tree, [pass away] in a war, aka tell them to do a "manly task" first!
5. Leave 'em on read. They may or may not catch on and self correct but either way ur depriving them of attention, which is what that statement wants.
#35
“Do you not know how to make sandwiches? That’s sad. I texted your mom and sent her this screenshot, because it seems you’re too shy to tell her you don’t know how to make sandwiches :)” and then block him. You can choose to actually text/FB message his mother if you want. Or don’t but let him suffer that ball of anxiety.
Send the text to other girls and give them a heads up. Maybe the next day at school they all bring in sandwiches that a male figure in their lives made for them and go “oh yum! Dad/Older Brother/Step Dad/Grandpa made me lunch today!” And all the girls eat their sandwiches while staring at the kid and his friends.
#36
Personally I like to be condescending my go to’s are usually “it’s okay some people never grow out of not being allowed to touch knives” or “wow sandwich is a big word for you” if I’m completely done with the bs I use this gem that I’ve shamelessly stolen from my FIL “you have 2 feet and a heartbeat - off you go sweetheart”.
#38
The best response is "I do not deserve this level of disrespect, joke or not. I guess we end here".
#39
Tell him Gordon Ramsey can teach him how to cook if he cannot.
#40
“Sorry I like men, not dependents who can’t take care of themselves. Maybe try a daycare next time.”
#41
Someone using words like that is trying to cause pain and conflict, on top of trying to batter down someone else's will. There is no response that will "get them back", or any such thing. Sadly, they will simply go on being what they are, because someone made them into that. There are very, VERY few things that can jar someone out of an ingrained pattern of hate.
I've never found anything to do but walk away. It only ever escalates from there.
#42
I agree with the other commenters that a 14 year old boy deserves nothing but a block and delete.
However. If you happen to be a gamer and some idiot thinks you should "go make me a sandwich" you tell him "your mom and I agreed you need salads".
#43
"oh, I don't date children, did you confuse me for one of your parents?" edit: don't say 'mommy', says 'parents'.
"can't you take care of yourself? How weird".
#44
"that is so sad. wow that's sad." why, they ask? "you're so desperate you'll settle for people you hate."
it was just a joke? "yea, a creepy joke that's older than my dad."
The best reaction is to just realize they're sad desperate sacks and get tf away from them, or send them away, but if she's stuck with them like on a bus or in a class, i think this might help:
"that joke is older than my dad. dude i thought you'd be real with me but you're fake. Shame really."
#45
“Sorry to hear about your mother”. But seriously that boy has no manners right now and has probably been taught that is somehow appropriate language and an appropriate way to speak to another person, just block numbers and ignore the boy if possible.
#46
Go outside and fix my car.
#47
Go [to] war!
Similar to how women have been placed in subservient roles throughout history, men have consistently been forced to go to war.
Forrest Hobbs 13 hours ago
This one doesn't make a lot of sense, if only because men who go to war have typically been required to prepare their own food. Back in the very old days, that could well have meant grinding your own grain to make your own porridge.
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Ali 9 hours ago
I thought I would enjoy these, good comebacks amuse me. However, I was generally irritated by how many of them were not at all good advice for 13 year olds. Why on earth should the girl ignore him? No! We call out things like that, and have every right to. How is blocking going to help when chances are very high she will be unable to avoid him for years. Also, a young boy of this age doesn't have an ingrained pattern of hatred, they are learning too. He attempted to embarrass her - because she is a girl. Her response should reflect that - she should embarrass him for making a ridiculous comment. Even if only to say 'wow, did you really say that?' I work in a high school, it's generally easy to turn boys around below this age - admittedly a few need real adult intervention to reverse this if it is a combination of low self esteem, toxic household environment and inappropriate web behaviour. often, it is a child trying something out, you shut them down and job done. By 16 it's harder
Catlady6000 18 hours ago
Tell her to be thankful he is showing himself at the beginning. And to always pay attention when they do. And maybe Op can talk to the boy, hopefully he's still salvageable
Seedy Vine 17 hours ago (edited)
"I hope ya don't fvck like ya cook!" But that retort is for adults.
Ali 9 hours ago
I thought I would enjoy these, good comebacks amuse me. However, I was generally irritated by how many of them were not at all good advice for 13 year olds. Why on earth should the girl ignore him? No! We call out things like that, and have every right to. How is blocking going to help when chances are very high she will be unable to avoid him for years. Also, a young boy of this age doesn't have an ingrained pattern of hatred, they are learning too. He attempted to embarrass her - because she is a girl. Her response should reflect that - she should embarrass him for making a ridiculous comment. Even if only to say 'wow, did you really say that?' I work in a high school, it's generally easy to turn boys around below this age - admittedly a few need real adult intervention to reverse this if it is a combination of low self esteem, toxic household environment and inappropriate web behaviour. often, it is a child trying something out, you shut them down and job done. By 16 it's harder
Catlady6000 18 hours ago
Tell her to be thankful he is showing himself at the beginning. And to always pay attention when they do. And maybe Op can talk to the boy, hopefully he's still salvageable
Seedy Vine 17 hours ago (edited)
"I hope ya don't fvck like ya cook!" But that retort is for adults.
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