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Mom Asks Why Husband Suddenly Hates Nanny, Gets A Response She Didn’t Expect
A nanny with dark hair and a yellow watch crouches, helping a baby in a blue top explore a wicker basket. Husband can't stand chaotic nanny, handles kids well.

RARE PHOTOS: Wife refuses get less chaotic nanny | Vintage Vibes

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Hiring someone to look after your kids is no small thing. You want them to be responsible and keep your children safe. After all, you’re putting some of the most important people in your life in their hands.

But this Redditor says her family’s nanny is a little different, describing the 21-year-old as a “ball of chaos.” She plans plenty of fun activities for the kids, including throwing a birthday party for the dog, yet has also called in sick just 20 minutes before the school day ended.

Her husband thinks they need someone more responsible, while she adores their nanny and refuses to let her go.

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    The man wants to fire the family’s 21-year-old nanny because he thinks she is too chaotic

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    His wife, however, adores her and refuses to let her go

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    At the end of the day, the right nanny is the one who fits the family’s needs and expectations

    Being a nanny is a big responsibility. You’re taking care of someone else’s children, often for hours at a time, and the job can involve much more than simply keeping an eye on them. 

    Depending on what a family needs, a nanny might make breakfast, pack school lunches, help with math homework, pick the kids up from school, drive them to soccer practice, keep track of medications, or even teach them how to play an instrument.

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    For many people, it can also become a lifelong career, with some studying early childhood education, taking professional childcare courses, and getting certified in first aid or CPR.

    Even with all of that, figuring out who’s the right nanny for a particular family can be tricky. A person could look amazing on paper and still be completely wrong for the household. 

    And just because a nanny is very strict does not mean they’re automatically doing a great job either. Research has actually linked very authoritarian parenting styles with lower self-esteem and less independence in kids.

    The same goes the other way around. Someone can have a great personality and click really well with the kids, but completely fall apart the moment something stressful happens. And when you’re the one watching children all day, that’s obviously something parents have to think about.

    In this case, it’s pretty easy to see why the mom is so attached to Mila. The 21-year-old sounds genuinely fun. She threw the family dog an early birthday party and helped the kids run a driveway sale. She also made sure one of them had everything needed for a school project, so she clearly puts effort into what the kids care about.

    At the same time, you can also see why the dad is not fully sold. Mila drove 30 minutes to a Walmart when the same supplies were available just a few blocks away. She sometimes leaves the car messy, and having the kids chat up random strangers during that driveway sale could understandably make any parent nervous. 

    So how do you actually decide whether a nanny is a good fit? Different childcare organizations tend to point to some of the same basic qualities. A good nanny should genuinely enjoy working with children, know how to keep them safe, be honest with parents, and handle unexpected situations well. Training in childcare, first aid, or CPR can also be a big plus.

    Beyond that, a lot comes down to what a particular family expects. The mom and dad probably need to sit down and talk about what they actually want from the person looking after their kids. 

    Are regular fast-food treats okay? Do they care how far she drives the kids for errands? Do they want her to stick more closely to their schedules or keep the car tidier? And how much freedom should she have when planning spontaneous activities?

    Once they agree on those expectations, they can have the same conversation with Mila and see whether she can meet them. She may still be a great fit for the family with a few clearer rules in place. Or they may realize that they simply want very different things from a nanny.

    What do you think? Does Mila sound like a fun nanny who just needs a little more structure, or does the husband have a point and they should look for someone else? Share your thoughts in the comments.

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    Most readers thought the nanny showed some red flags and agreed that the husband should also have a say in who cares for their children

    A few others, however, thought she sounded fun and like a great fit for the family

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    Oleksandra Kyryliuk

    Oleksandra Kyryliuk

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

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    Oleksandra is an experienced copywriter with a master’s degree in International Communication. At Bored Panda, she covers everything the internet has to offer, from art and culture to personal relationships and whatever rabbit hole comes next. Away from the screen, she recharges with tea ceremonies and slow afternoons at art galleries.

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    Oleksandra Kyryliuk

    Oleksandra Kyryliuk

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    Oleksandra is an experienced copywriter with a master’s degree in International Communication. At Bored Panda, she covers everything the internet has to offer, from art and culture to personal relationships and whatever rabbit hole comes next. Away from the screen, she recharges with tea ceremonies and slow afternoons at art galleries.

    What do you think ?
    liam newton-harding
    Community Member
    2 days ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Frankly, it sounds like someone is in love with a Manic Pixie Dream Girl...and it's not the husband.

    liam newton-harding
    Community Member
    2 days ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7hyIlrfGR5g

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    StarCrossedFriday
    Community Member
    2 days ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is tricky, but...I do think it would be unfair to fire her without at least explaining his issues to her. If the kids love her, and she goes out of her way to get things they need/plan fun trips, that's worth a lot too. I had a nanny when I was about 7 to 9, an older woman who would literally give me and my brother toast with salted butter as a snack after school every single time, and only ever took us out to run errands for herself or visit her friends, talking for hours while we just had to sit there. I would have absolutely loved to have this nanny, although a bit more structure might be advisable.

    Jay Scales
    Community Member
    2 days ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'd be wanting to know why the husband's attitude has suddenly changed...

    Suzie
    Community Member
    2 days ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Probably because his 11 year old son wanted to share a bed with her. He is probably worried the son is developing feelings for his nanny and while it won't be much longer until he doesn't need a nanny, the younger ones have a ways to go so they'll need a nanny for several more years. I don't think he wants to walk into a situation where his son is now 16 and hooking up with the nanny.

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    liam newton-harding
    Community Member
    2 days ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Frankly, it sounds like someone is in love with a Manic Pixie Dream Girl...and it's not the husband.

    liam newton-harding
    Community Member
    2 days ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7hyIlrfGR5g

    Load More Replies...
    StarCrossedFriday
    Community Member
    2 days ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is tricky, but...I do think it would be unfair to fire her without at least explaining his issues to her. If the kids love her, and she goes out of her way to get things they need/plan fun trips, that's worth a lot too. I had a nanny when I was about 7 to 9, an older woman who would literally give me and my brother toast with salted butter as a snack after school every single time, and only ever took us out to run errands for herself or visit her friends, talking for hours while we just had to sit there. I would have absolutely loved to have this nanny, although a bit more structure might be advisable.

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    Jay Scales
    Community Member
    2 days ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'd be wanting to know why the husband's attitude has suddenly changed...

    Suzie
    Community Member
    2 days ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Probably because his 11 year old son wanted to share a bed with her. He is probably worried the son is developing feelings for his nanny and while it won't be much longer until he doesn't need a nanny, the younger ones have a ways to go so they'll need a nanny for several more years. I don't think he wants to walk into a situation where his son is now 16 and hooking up with the nanny.

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