BIZARRE: Cheating with married people | Mind Blowing Facts

Most of the replies on this list actually stem from a fairly common promise, something relationship researchers call a “future-faking” tactic. According to studies, this is a common pattern in which the cheater will promise an imminent separation or divorce, leading their unaware affair partner to believe that the relationship is already coming to an end.

However, clinical data shows that fewer than 5% to 10% of people who have affairs actually leave their spouses for their affair partners. This can leave the third party holding on to the hope that the other relationship will eventually end.

Another fairly common explanation (or excuse, depending on your point of view) is, again, the promise of an open marriage. Around 4% to 7% of adults in the U.S. are in an open relationship, or what experts often call a consensual non-monogamous (CNM) relationship. This can include polyamory and even swinging.

But the problem here isn't just how common open relationships are; it's the assumption. The Institute for Family Studies (IFS) actually conducted a survey that found people in open relationships might exaggerate their spouse's consent, leading the affair partner to assume that the relationship is fully consensual for everyone involved.

While many of the responses fully knew their new date had a partner, that isn't always the case. In fact, it's fairly common for the other person to be completely unaware; after all, modern relationships will often now begin through dating apps, where people can remain as anonymous as they want while seeking the attention they want.

In fact, a study published in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships found that over 30% of men and 18% of women may hide their real relationship status, avoiding admitting that they're married or in committed relationships in order to cheat. This can leave the affair partner completely unaware, at least initially.

Plenty of the affair partners on the list, however, were fully infatuated with the other person, to the point where they were actively seeking validation or even viewing the secrecy as a sign of intense passion. This is more of an emotional response, which studies by the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy (AAMFT) note is fairly common.

Almost half of the people who took part in the research reported having emotional affairs, in which the other person was actively filling an emotional void rather than a physical one. This can happen for many reasons, but the study also points out that the promise of a low-commitment burden for both the cheater and the affair partner can be a factor, as neither is necessarily looking to take the relationship any further.

And actually, the statistics on cheating partners are pretty shocking. The University of Chicago has been conducting long-term research showing that around 20% of men and 13% of married women will engage in a physical relationship with someone else at some point in their lives.

That figure becomes even higher for men as they grow older. This can happen for many reasons, but surprisingly, financial dependency is one of them. Ego threats can often be at the root of cheating, as husbands who are financially dependent on their wives are reportedly five times more likely to have an affair.

Affairs can happen for a number of reasons, and these threads offer a more human, perspective-driven look at how they can happen. But academic studies can add some much-needed context. Many of the replies suggest that the reason people gave in to a relationship with someone already in a committed partnership was none other than loneliness.

Per studies, both the cheater and the affair partner will often cite emotional withdrawal as one of the main reasons for entering an affair, along with the need for some kind of physical or emotional connection with someone else. They may turn to outside sources to find a sense of belonging and validation — instead of seeking self-validation and/or ending the relationships.