MYSTERIOUS: Timothydowd - What They Never Told You

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Contented potato. (They/them)

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Contented potato. (They/them)

Community Member

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2 posts

136 comments

128 upvotes

944 points

I am a potato. I am content. I live on Mars. Life is good.

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Contented potato. (They/them) • upvoted 32 items 3 years ago

68 Funny Tweets About In-Laws That Are Just Too Real

thursday night be lit

40 Times Children Accidentally Proved Themselves To Be True Comedians, As Shared In This Viral Thread

petition to call shorts t-pants

68 Funny Tweets About In-Laws That Are Just Too Real

thursday night be lit

40 Times Children Accidentally Proved Themselves To Be True Comedians, As Shared In This Viral Thread

petition to call shorts t-pants

40 Times Children Accidentally Proved Themselves To Be True Comedians, As Shared In This Viral Thread

I don't think I'm skeptical

This Account Is Entirely Dedicated To Very Relatable Memes And Here Are 50 Of The Best Ones

Yes I'ma drive into you to get that baby on board

Omlette

41 “That’s Awesome” Kind Of Things People Came Across And Shared In This Dedicated Online Group

That's General Murder Mittens to you buddy

41 “That’s Awesome” Kind Of Things People Came Across And Shared In This Dedicated Online Group

I hope they are both safe. I really do.

93 of the Best Memes of All Time That Are Icons of Internet Culture

Same. I'll never understand the appeal of cutesy baby calendars or instagram pages or whatever. I simply don't understand the appeal.

93 of the Best Memes of All Time That Are Icons of Internet Culture

you know that dr who episode about the fat pills? those little fat gremlins are what babies look like to me

93 of the Best Memes of All Time That Are Icons of Internet Culture

No, you disike babies just like me, i will never have kids and also don't like them at all

93 of the Best Memes of All Time That Are Icons of Internet Culture

i feel you....🤔

93 of the Best Memes of All Time That Are Icons of Internet Culture

It's (usually) different when it's your kid. The body releases chemical hormones like oxytocin. It's really apparent when people show you pictures of the ugliest kid you've ever seen and asking you, "Isn't she just adorable???" However there are people that it doesn't happen to. It's not terrible to not like other people's kids.

93 of the Best Memes of All Time That Are Icons of Internet Culture

Exactly that! Many spiders, tbh, look at least interesting.

93 of the Best Memes of All Time That Are Icons of Internet Culture

I think women who have birthed them, generally find them all charming and adorable, which makes sense. However, as a woman that never had them (by choice), I'm not of the opinion that they are all automatically cute, and I'm definitely uncomfortable holding one, even though people seem to think that I MUST want to because of my sex--please don't, I feel weird. I don't even like to look children in the eye! Some how that eye expects WAY too much from me, lol. All that being said, anyone that says they don't love to hear babies laugh, is either lying or a monster. There are very few things out there that can cause such an involuntary smile as that sound (but they could still be ugly and I don't want to hold it. :))

93 of the Best Memes of All Time That Are Icons of Internet Culture

If so, hello fellow monster 😄

93 of the Best Memes of All Time That Are Icons of Internet Culture

Oh, you are not a monster, you are just honest...I like that (I also have the same opinion on babies :D )

93 of the Best Memes of All Time That Are Icons of Internet Culture

You’re normal, unaffected by procreation hormones that unfortunately arrive sooner or later.

93 of the Best Memes of All Time That Are Icons of Internet Culture

I have two kids. I completely understand what you're saying. My own weren't nearly as disturbing as other peoples (because chemicals and love and all that) but...yikes. Your average kitten So Cute, your average human baby? Not so much.

93 of the Best Memes of All Time That Are Icons of Internet Culture

No you are NOT a monster! I have several children and I promise you they are not very cute! Especially at/after birth. While they grow on you shortly after - that does not change the fact that they are crying, squirming, smelly, annoying little blobs for a looong while after they’re born! ☺️

93 of the Best Memes of All Time That Are Icons of Internet Culture

It could be because of the stark contrast between how newborns are portrayed in popular culture (always nice, clean and cute) as opposed to how they appear in reality...

50 Times Winners Of The Greatest Photoshop Battles Made The Internet A Funnier Place (New Pics)

SpongeBob squarepants!

50 Times Winners Of The Greatest Photoshop Battles Made The Internet A Funnier Place (New Pics)

If this nautical nonsense be something you wish, Then drop on the deck and flip like a fish!

50 Times Winners Of The Greatest Photoshop Battles Made The Internet A Funnier Place (New Pics)

SpongeBob squarepants!

50 Times Winners Of The Greatest Photoshop Battles Made The Internet A Funnier Place (New Pics)

Absorbent and yellow and porous is he (yes that is the actual lyrics)

50 Times Winners Of The Greatest Photoshop Battles Made The Internet A Funnier Place (New Pics)

Most chihuahuas are hellraisers. lol

50 Times Winners Of The Greatest Photoshop Battles Made The Internet A Funnier Place (New Pics)

Schwarzenegger can’t prevent the situation anyway. Tyson is rubbing it in.

50 Times Winners Of The Greatest Photoshop Battles Made The Internet A Funnier Place (New Pics)

Amber had taco bell

50 Times Winners Of The Greatest Photoshop Battles Made The Internet A Funnier Place (New Pics)

SpongeBob SquarePants

50 Times Winners Of The Greatest Photoshop Battles Made The Internet A Funnier Place (New Pics)

Inhales OHHHHHHHHHH Who lives in a pineapple under the sea!

Show All 32 Upvotes

Contented potato. (They/them) • commented on 8 posts 3 years ago

50 Witty, Creative And Fiery Protest Signs For Your Own Amusement

Can someone tell me what this is protesting?

30 Times People Failed At Geography So Badly, They Made The Internet Facepalm (New Pics)

Gotta keep out them damn Italians /s

50 Witty, Creative And Fiery Protest Signs For Your Own Amusement

Can someone tell me what this is protesting?

30 Times People Failed At Geography So Badly, They Made The Internet Facepalm (New Pics)

Gotta keep out them damn Italians /s

50 Of The Funniest And Most Absurd Thumbnails Spotted Online

KAAAAARL

50 Designs That Are So Terrible, They Should Have Gotten Someone Fired (New Pics)

*sigh* will we ever live in such a utopia?

This Facebook Page Is About All Things Nerdy, Here Are 50 Of Its Funniest Memes

I miss Alabama once again, and I think it’s a sin

‘Weird History’ Is An Account That Shares Interesting, Odd, And Funny Things That Happened Throughout History (50 New Pics)

I bet it’s protected from such tomfoolery but it’d be so much fun to build an Ancient Greek style palace or something up there

93 of the Best Memes of All Time That Are Icons of Internet Culture

Impossible burger

40 Bizarre, Uplifting, Or Straight Up Chucklesome, Yet Unlikely Personal Stories As Shared Online That Are Very Much True

After the attacks, all flights in the US were canceled that day except one. My mom was on it

Show All 8 Comments

Contented potato. (They/them) • submitted 2 new posts 3 years ago

Curiosities

Hey Pandas, What Is Your Best Redemption Story? (Closed)

Curiosities

Hey Pandas, What Do You Want Advice On? (Closed)

Contented potato. (They/them) • submitted 8 list additions 3 years ago

Hey Pandas! What Was The Most Luckiest Moment Of Your Life?

Hey Pandas, Did You Have An Imaginary Pet Or Friend Growing Up?

Hey Pandas, What’s The Worst Thing That’s Ever Been Said About You Behind Your Back? (Closed)

Hey Pandas, What Are You Doing For The Fourth Of July? (Closed)

Hey Pandas, What Is Something You Need To Get Off Your Chest? (Closed)

Hey Pandas, Type Your Username Into An AI Image Generator And Share The Results (Closed)

Hey Pandas, What Is Something People Don't Know About The Country You Live In? (Closed)

Hey Pandas, Why Did You Join Bored Panda? (Closed)

Contented potato. (They/them) • commented on 20 posts 3 years ago

50 Witty, Creative And Fiery Protest Signs For Your Own Amusement

Can someone tell me what this is protesting?

30 Times People Failed At Geography So Badly, They Made The Internet Facepalm (New Pics)

Gotta keep out them damn Italians /s

50 Of The Funniest And Most Absurd Thumbnails Spotted Online

KAAAAARL

50 Designs That Are So Terrible, They Should Have Gotten Someone Fired (New Pics)

*sigh* will we ever live in such a utopia?

This Facebook Page Is About All Things Nerdy, Here Are 50 Of Its Funniest Memes

I miss Alabama once again, and I think it’s a sin

‘Weird History’ Is An Account That Shares Interesting, Odd, And Funny Things That Happened Throughout History (50 New Pics)

I bet it’s protected from such tomfoolery but it’d be so much fun to build an Ancient Greek style palace or something up there

93 of the Best Memes of All Time That Are Icons of Internet Culture

Impossible burger

40 Bizarre, Uplifting, Or Straight Up Chucklesome, Yet Unlikely Personal Stories As Shared Online That Are Very Much True

After the attacks, all flights in the US were canceled that day except one. My mom was on it

"The Best And Worst Of Twitter": 50 Of The Most Surprising Takes On Pretty Much Everything (New Pics)

Brochacho!

“Take My Money!”: 50 Wacky Products You Didn't Know You Needed, As Shared By The "Odditymall" Facebook Page (New Pics)

i would actually wear this. im sorry

Our Readers Share How Their Friends And Family Reacted To Them Coming Out (30 Stories)

Lmao

Hey Pandas, What Strange Things Have You Overheard?

Engaging right to the end. I need to know what happens next

50 Rare Historical Photos That You Probably Haven't Seen Before

Can someone pls explain to me the hate against hippies? They seem pretty chill to me

50 Times People Didn't Hold Back And Were Brutally Honest About Their Work On Twitter

Ohh thank you. I understand now!

30 People Share The Funniest Things They’ve Heard Their Partners Say In Their Sleep

Downvotes ARE NOT dislike buttons! Please, if you don’t agree with my guy Freddie, let him know in the comments or forever hold your peace.

50 Times Felines Pulled a Funny Cat Face

That’s one good-looking cat

30 Times People Did Something So Stupid That It Surprised Even Themselves, As Shared In This Online Group

Love how the wife just went along with it

30 Pics That “Make You Reminisce” About How Good The Past Was

I am a teen. My only experience with this is that one episode of the Office. Can someone pls explain planking to me? It sounds worth a laugh

35 Times People Were Unmatched On Dating Apps For Hilarious Reasons

Parent: Megatron, bedtime! Kid: NO ONE COMMANDS MEGATRON! Parent: then it pleases me to be the first.

30 Times When People Received Hate For The Weirdest Things Ever, As Shared In This Online Community

MORE BLUE

Contented potato. (They/them) • upvoted 20 items 3 years ago

68 Funny Tweets About In-Laws That Are Just Too Real

thursday night be lit

40 Times Children Accidentally Proved Themselves To Be True Comedians, As Shared In This Viral Thread

I don't think I'm skeptical

40 Times Children Accidentally Proved Themselves To Be True Comedians, As Shared In This Viral Thread

petition to call shorts t-pants

This Account Is Entirely Dedicated To Very Relatable Memes And Here Are 50 Of The Best Ones

Yes I'ma drive into you to get that baby on board

Omlette

50 Times Old People Used Social Media And Provided The Internet With These Gems

ₘy fₒₙₜ ₕₐₛ gₒₙₑ ₐₗₗ wₑᵢᵣd ₚₗₑₐₛₑ ₕₑₗₚ ₜₕₐₙₖₛ

40 Times Ad Placements Were So Out Of Touch, It Resulted In Hilarious Mishaps

>:( my family is Italian

“Bad Photoshops”: 50 Pics That Are So Bad They’re (Almost) Good

This is BS guys the baby couldn’t even reach the top of the cube to turn it. Fake.

41 “That’s Awesome” Kind Of Things People Came Across And Shared In This Dedicated Online Group

I hope they are both safe. I really do.

41 “That’s Awesome” Kind Of Things People Came Across And Shared In This Dedicated Online Group

That's General Murder Mittens to you buddy

93 of the Best Memes of All Time That Are Icons of Internet Culture

It could be because of the stark contrast between how newborns are portrayed in popular culture (always nice, clean and cute) as opposed to how they appear in reality...

93 of the Best Memes of All Time That Are Icons of Internet Culture

You’re normal, unaffected by procreation hormones that unfortunately arrive sooner or later.

93 of the Best Memes of All Time That Are Icons of Internet Culture

Oh, you are not a monster, you are just honest...I like that (I also have the same opinion on babies :D )

93 of the Best Memes of All Time That Are Icons of Internet Culture

If so, hello fellow monster 😄

93 of the Best Memes of All Time That Are Icons of Internet Culture

i feel you....🤔

93 of the Best Memes of All Time That Are Icons of Internet Culture

No, you disike babies just like me, i will never have kids and also don't like them at all

93 of the Best Memes of All Time That Are Icons of Internet Culture

you know that dr who episode about the fat pills? those little fat gremlins are what babies look like to me

93 of the Best Memes of All Time That Are Icons of Internet Culture

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