YOU WONT BELIEVE: Service workers found weird funny disturbing things client home - You Need To See This

Former cable tech. Saturday morning, 8am, I knock on the door of house in a lower middle class neighborhood. Little dude answers the door. Its obvious I woke him.

He points me to the TV and wanders back to bed. I kneel down and reach behind the TV to unplug the coax but I can't see what I'm doing so my eyes wander around the room. The place is clean and modest. There's a picture stand, about 6 feet tall, that holds about ten 8x11 portraits. Everyone of them is of a hefty guy in flamboyant drag. Huh, look at that.

So I go outside and finish my work. I come back in and drag guy is standing in the kitchen in a pink robe done up as a woman who just woke up. He shaved. He put makeup on. He drew bags under his eyes. His wig is tussled to look like bed head. He speaks in a falsetto. He brings me a cup of coffee and I explain that squirrels chewed their cable line. I address him as "Ma'am" which delights him. Everything's cool.

Then a chicken walks out of the back room. The chicken is wearing a red baseball jersey and red baseball cap. Then another chicken appears in a pink dress. And another one in a brown sweater. They walk over to drag guy and he casually pets one as he's talking to me. The princess chicken craps on his floor and he cleans it up with a paper towel. No big deal. Just a very friendly likeable guy who is very serious about dressing as a woman and his costumed poultry.

Stepped in s**t, the second I stepped in the house. Dog mess. The guy said don't worry about it. I heavy right footed all over his house. Gross. I left like 10 s****y footprints and proceeded to fix his A/C on the roof.

Another one, I knocked on the door, and the guy answered with his pants around his ankles. I said hey let me get my tools, be right back. I came back like 2 minutes later, and he is walking around pulling his pants up, unbuttoned, and they keep falling. For like 15 minutes while I'm troubleshooting.

I'm an insurance adjuster. I had to present an estimate to both the homeowner and a life size mannequin that she had seated at the table that she told me to address as "Marie." While I was explaining the repair process, she started to paint Marie's nails.

Former satellite install tech here. I have many to add to this but the best was a family that had a Jaguar in the driveway, getting 3 HD DVR boxes, international dish with channels. They had NO FLOOR! I had to step over the piping and framing on the dirt floor to get from room to room. It was a rotten away wood floor. They were nice as hell.

Work as a Low Voltage Security installer (Home security and small business and the like).

I'm like 99% sure this one old lady we installed for was a N**i..

She had a VERY LARGE amount of Pro-N**i WWII books and items... hardcore german accent... two perfectly trained german shepherds.. And a photo of her in what looked to be late teens/early 20's with a god d**n Iron Cross around her neck.....

Nicest lady in the world and outside of visiting her home, you wouldn't have ever known. Her husband she married recently (within 5-7 years ago) is like this hardcore full blooded American guy (the kind who only buys "Made in America" items and what not).

I had a guy silenty walk up behind me holding a p*stol by his side and basically interrogate me, I said to him, "Didn't you call me out here?" And he was like "yeah but you never know if someone's gonna steal from you." Got out of there as quick as I could and he was blacklisted.

I think I’ve won this one, unfortunately.

Honorable mention to the couple that I just worked for, younger black lady with an older white guy. ‘Don’t mind the mirror on the ceiling. I appreciate your discretion with that’ she said. ‘We all have our ‘things’’.

My worst one though, I was hired to install a few bifold doors in a home. I was greeted for an early 20s Filipino boy. But he wasn’t the homeowner. He was quite flamboyant and showed me where the bifold doors were to install.

I ignored his appearance and got to work. Shortly after I started, the homeowner woke up. He proceeded to pull up a lawn chair (inside a pretty nice home) I assume so he can get extra close to me.

He was completely naked except for very skimpy red underwear. I 100% avoided eye contact and ignored him. Not out of fear, but because it was pretty clear what he was trying to do. He was completely ‘manspreading’ watching me. Sipping a margarita and smoking a cigarette… at 9AM. After about 45 minutes I was wrapping up that set up bifold doors and he goes ‘I’ve been sitting here for the last 30 minutes and you don’t say A WORD! Aren’t you wondering why a man is sitting here practically naked watching you work?’

I go ‘oh sorry, didn’t even realize you were there’. He hated that lol.

He said ‘what would you say to me if I wanted to SUCK… YOUR… D**K…’.

I said ‘I would say ‘no thanks’.’ And just walked away.

His boy toy heard this interaction and had a word with him. He didn’t say anything else to me, but continued to follow me around the rest of the morning while I finished my work. Halfway through finishing I realized my Gatorade went missing, only to reappear right where I left it.

They said SPECIFICALLY ‘are you going to drink your Gatorade?’

I said ‘uh… no thanks. I lost track of it a while back and not sure if one of you drank from it’.

They continued to ask me to stay and drink margaritas and smoke, but I just collected my check and left.

Turns out the dude was a retired cop so he definitely had weapons and restraints in the house. I just took my money to the bank and never heard from him again.

Former cop here: I responded to a house for a domestic disturbance. I arrived and a very upset lady approached me. She demanded that "they" get out of her house. I entered the living room and no one was in there.

After looking around the rest of the house and not seeing anyone I asked her who needs to get out of her house? While pointing at the empty couch she replied "these mothef**kers right here." I caught on that she was mentally ill. I then ordered the non-existent "mothef**kers" to leave the lady's house. She was thankful.

Did a wall furnace repair at a rental once while two teenage girls made out on the couch right next to the furnace I was repairing. I mean they were really going at it. I finished the repair right before the clothes started coming off. Needless to say, uncomfortable.

Did a plumbing repair in some gay guys bathroom, and there was a floor to ceiling portrait of some naked guy right across from the toilet. Needless to say, uncomfortable.

There is this lady who I still do jobs for occasionally. She takes 15 minutes to tell me the problem, then instantly bursts into tears. I mean this lady cries at least 5 times while I am there. Needless to say, uncomfortable.

I can't even tell you how many "hoarder" houses I have been in over the last 24 years. One house, this lady had stuff stacked up everywhere. It wasn't smelly or anything, just stacks and stacks of stuff. There were little paths to get to the different rooms. I know she was embarrassed about it. She said to me, "I bet this is the messiest house you've ever been in," to which I replied, "No...but its right up there!"

But without a doubt, the craziest thing ever was about 15 years ago. I had to install an a/c at a house where a schizophrenic lady lived. Her father, the owner of the house, was a great guy, a regular customer. I had been to his daughters house a few times, and for some reason, she was ok with me. Her father had told me ahead of time how to act, what to not say, etc. So, I got along fine with her. Well, we had a new guy on that job, and he was just out of refrigeration school. He was wearing his uniform he got from the school, as his work issued ones hadn't arrived yet. It had some kind of patch on the shoulder, like a cross. Also, this guy was tall, like 6'2, and had a shaved head.

We get to the job, I go in first to she how she is first, and she seems normal. So I bring the new guy in, to introduce him to her, to make sure she will be ok with him. The second she laid eyes on him, she turned into some kind of evil demon. "N**I N**I N**I!" she starts screaming, I mean at the TOP of her lungs. The new guy is frozen in fear. I am standing between him and her. She starts grabbing things, books, knickknacks, anything she can, and is hurling them at the new guy, all the while screaming stuff about N*zis and Jew K**lers and she's not going to d*e today....I told the new guy to run. Somehow I managed to calm her down. I called her father. He had to take her somewhere else for a couple days while we did the job. It really surprised me because I mean me and her would have normal conversations all the other times I was there, but I guess she just snapped when she saw the new guy.

Handyman here, strangest things I'd ever seen were the times I had to unclog toilets because ladies flushed their tampons down the toilet, (Ladies: DO NOT FLUSH TAMPONS DOWN THE F*****G TOILET, IT WILL F**K UP YOUR PLUMBING) the time I had to unclog a toilet because "something" got stuck in it (it turned out to be a gigantic b**t plug, and no, it wasn't a s**y lady, it was a middle-aged dude.).

Security system tech

Pretty sure i set up a grow house

Edit: fyi.....the security system doesnt have to alert the cops.

Went to an apartment to repair a/c , dude answers the door obviously high as s**t, room smells like w**d. He says 'wait a sec' and closes the door for a minute. Let's me in and I see a bowl of w**d on the table, he notices I've seen it tries to distract me and hides it.

As I'm working see the couch beside me has 1 side pulled slightly away from the wall. Look behind and see a massive b*ng not so discreetly hidden. I started laughing quietly as the st*ner looked amazed that I had busted his unfindable hiding spot. He then rushes over and pulls the 'hey where did this come from must be my roommates'. Tried real hard to contain laughter for the rest of the job.

I had a side job working for a TV repair outfit. I was hired to drive the company truck, unhook the set, load it up, then return it once the repairs were complete.

On this particular occasion, the business owner decided to tag along with me to get out of the office. We knock on the door and immediately notice that EVERYTHING is white. White carpet, white couch, white mop dog, white-ish art on the walls, white everywhere...it was almost clinical. The guy held us at the door and handed us booties to wear. He wouldn't allow us in the house without wearing them. He didn't want us to track any dirt into the house. Whatever dude, just let me get the TV so we can get going.

We don the booties, walk in and start disconnecting and labelling cables and get ready to remove the TV from the wall. The guy walks into the living room from the kitchen with a huge bowl of tomato soup, trips over the dog and spills most of the bright red contents all over the carpet and couch. It was all I could do to keep from laughing while he fetched the carpet cleaning machine, cussing up a storm the whole time.

After removing the TV, and loading it up, we walked back to the door to let the man know what to expect, repair timeframe, etc. He wouldn't allow us back in without new booties, since we had gone outside and 'ruined' our current pairs, and was clearly upset that we had interrupted his cleaning. Through the opening in the doorway, I could see the little white mop-dog was under the dining room table in full s**t mode, squeezing one out onto the carpet.

HVAC guy here.

Wasn't me, but one of my guys said he had a lady with a full scale 'dungeon.'

Was installing a home security system

The lady was nice as hell. But she owned aloooot of pythons.

Aloot of free range pythons.

Alot of leg cuddling free range pythons.

In another life I did maintenance work on government housing projects in what was then the 4th most dangerous city in the county. Most of the stories were depressing, but some of the lighter ones:

There was the elderly, blind pensioner who liked to listen to soap operas, so instead of picking up a second-hand Goodwill TV he went out and bought himself a high-end 72' inch television set: This was back when they were still cathode-ray-tubes and weighed about 600 pounds; we had to remove his double patio-doors to get the behemoth into the apartment and then it took up one entire end of his living room. The kicker was he just used an antenna to pick up local channels, but since he obviously couldn't see how to tune it, the screen was always *completely out of focus*: Just 72 inches of fuzziness and blur.

And in the same vein as some of the other stories in this thread: There was the apartment where I needed to go repair flush-valve on the toilet. I knew the tenant, perfectly nice woman. So, I'm not sure who was more embarrassed, myself or the lady of the house, when she escorted me to the bathroom and we both noticed at the exact same time that there was still a purple d***o suction-cupped to the top edge of the bathtub like some obscene latex monolith. After that she invited me to Christmas dinner. I declined, and I've never been able to figure out if those two incidents were related.

And then there was the time I went out during the middle of the day to a unit occupied by a married couple: My visit obviously surprised the wife, but she never objected to me being there (it was always an option to ask me to come back at a better time). I'm still not sure what she thought was going to transpire when I told her I was going to replace the broken clothes-hanger in the bedroom closet, but needless to say, when I opened the closet door and discovered that was the spot where her boyfriend had chosen to try and hide, we were all started enough to scream. Given that I was suddenly face-to-face with a yelling naked man, I think my scream was the most justified.

It was an interesting job: I would collect the shell casings that I found on the ground when doing my rounds. I lined them up next to each other, telling myself that when they filled the edge of my desk, I was quitting. Well, that happened in about the first month. I stayed for another 11 after that.

I do IT consulting, and where I am is one of the most cults-per-capita areas in the world. It makes sense that some of my clients wind up being cults. I've found myself in a number of *really* unusual situations, but the one that sticks out the most was a spiritual "tantric workshop". The whole thing was kinda nightmarish, delightfully topped with a 75 year old naked dude vigorously ringing a bell RIGHT next to my car, so i had to stand there and watch him and his pendulous balls fiercely swinging to and fro until I was able to leave.

Tech Support here. My job is to go clean up computers after you're done jacking it to dhaur63728hshifieihs.exe.

By far the weirdest house I went to was a shack out in the countryside. But I was more creeped out by the people than anything else. I'm used to working with older people, but there was something off with this t*******e of 70 year olds. Whatever. 1 hour and I'm out of here.

Their fapstation consisted of a cracked monitor and a crusty mouse and keyboard. Great. Boot up the computer. It's surprisingly new, Windows 7. Get to login screen and ask for password. He doesn't want to say it out loud so I let him type it in. Painstakingly slow, he pokes out "dragonslayer". How much more stereotypical can you get?

What feels like an eternity passes, the woman describes that she thinks he got the virus from a game. One of the men is laying on the bed half dressed on his bed while the other is grunting in the bathroom.

I'm greeted by Megan Fox on the beach. Then a popup saying local singles want to meet me. There were atleast a dozen popupa. But nothing beats the look of the woman when the gifs pop up. She looks at the guy on the bed with a speechless W*F. It's just as cringe worthy for me as well.

But the guy? He literally gives no f***s. All he says is "Just press ok" as he starts putting on a new pair of pants in the middle of a room. This is the most bizarre thing I've seen in a long time.

There's literally nothing I can do, I can't get the programs I need to remove the multi-layered s**t known as a man's paradise because his computer remains unresponsive for no less than five minutes as I sit there twiddling my thumbs as his wife is cussing him out.

Enough's enough, and I say we'll come back later to reformat as I awkwardly shuffle out the door.

Well, sometimes I work as a maid (what's the masculine version of that?) to make meets end. This one day I went to a seemingly normal apartment. The owner was a guy in his late 20's or early 30's. He went to work and left me cleaning there without much ado. When I went to clean his room, I bump into a dude (that the house owner didn't mention at all) and he's naked. There was even a d***o on the floor.

I didn't say a thing, but the two of them were hot. Me and hot dude stare awkwardily at each other for a while. I let him pick up his stuff and leave. Such is life in Brazil.

I do a lot of work for the diplomatic circles (Ottawa). The government of Malawi bought up a few properties around the city. A 7-figure home for the ambassador and a just-shy-of-7-figure home for the embassy. They then pulled out and closed down their missions, but sat on ~3-4 million in unused properties that slowly decayed.

A little more than a year ago they sold the former embassy. In the basement we found 6 premature baby incubators that had been donated but never shipped back to Malawi. I wondered how many children died while the government sat on donated aide and properties they were letting depreciate in value.