Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to pay our respects to the dearly departed United States. It was dearly loved, and it has now definitely departed.
We continue to celebrate its birth on the 4th of July with an awe-inspiring fireworks display on the National Mall after imbibing copious amounts of liquor at millions of backyard barbecues waving the red, white and blue and removing a finger or two exploding fireworks at home. Some of us will fire guns in the air. Some of us will die miles from where someone fired a gun into the air. Few of us will recognize or mourn the country’s death: dated July 1, 2024.
