In queer and trans communities, to “read” someone means to creatively call out their flaws with the intention of inflicting emotional damage. When Elektra from Pose tells another character, "I know you have two faces, but three chins is remarkable,” that is a read. When Jujubee on RuPaul’s Drag Race tells Raven, “Legendary? Looks like leg and dairy,” that is a read. The more specific the read, the better, and every characteristic about a person is fair game: their weight, their race, even their childhood trauma.
In the rest of society, people who speak like this are assholes; in the queer community, they’re icons. In fact, for many queers (myself included), learning how to deliver a scathing insult off-the-cuff is a rite of passage — and a skill that comes in handy when people inevitably try to come for your neck. But since I started seeing a therapist, I’ve realized that the amount of arguments I have with my queer friends each week probably isn’t too healthy. Now I wonder: Why the hell are we so mean to each other?
