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By now, you may have already heard about ‘Not How Girls Work’ — the online group that collects the most ridiculous and infuriating takes about women you can find on the internet.
But men aren’t immune to stereotypes either. Whether it’s thinking only about sex or not being able to express emotions, society has come up with plenty of strange ideas about how they are supposedly programmed to think and act.
And there’s a community dedicated to calling those out, too. The subreddit ‘Not How Guys Work’ isn’t an opposition to ‘Not How Girls Work’—it simply recognizes that people sometimes get men wrong as well.
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#2
This Will Always Be A Classic One
There is quantitative evidence that society holds differing views about masculinity, too. For example, a survey conducted by the Pew Research Center revealed that more Americans say people in the U.S. have mostly positive views of men who are manly or masculine (43%) than they say people have mostly negative views (25%).
About three-in-ten (31%) say most people have neither positive nor negative views of these men.
Of those who say people in the U.S. have mostly positive views of masculine men, more see this as a good thing (47%) than a bad thing (7%). Some 46% say it’s neither good nor bad that people have mostly positive views of masculine men.
#3
Ranking System
#4
Wow, Just Wow
#5
Is This A Thing?
Yayheterogeneity 14 hours ago
Yes, he is absurd. This whole thread is so absurd. It's sad to think that people are really believing in this toxic shite and educating their children accordingly.
When thinking about how men are viewed in the United States these days, 60% of Americans say most people don’t place enough value on men who are caring or open about their emotions.
The majority also say most people don’t value soft-spoken or affectionate men enough (55% each).
#6
That's Not How Our "Masculinity" Works But Okay
Kathrin Pukowsky 14 hours ago
I know that you can train things like grip strength, but that won't exactly grow your hands. I'd like to tell OP to grow bigger títs and see how that works out, but growing a brain would be far more beneficial.
#7
I Was Not Born With An Egg Meter, Personally. Should I Be Worried?
#8
Simple Creatures, Can't Read And Process More Than One Thing At A Time
Views are more split when it comes to traits that tend to be associated with traditional masculinity. For example, similar shares say society values men who are confident too much (26%) as those that say they’re valued too little (27%).
And the public leans toward saying there’s too much value (rather than too little value) placed on men who are:
- Assertive (34% vs. 25%);
- Risk-takers (33% vs. 22%);
- Physically strong (38% vs. 19%).
#9
Seriously, Isabella?
#10
Found This Gem
Roxy222uk 14 hours ago
I do find it amusing that these men think that they can generalise for all men when they’re so clearly wrong. Some men find confident, ambitious women very appealing. Oh, and the idea that a woman is going to turn down a Nobel Prize in case a man won’t find her attractive is also hilarious.
#12
Weird Guy Claims He Can Consciously Smell When A Woman Is Ovulating. Not How Girls Work Poaches The Post
Bonesko 12 hours ago (edited)
So not totally related to the post, but a couple years ago I was in line at the gas station and this guy behind sniffed me! Sniffed me very loudly! Then whispered in my ear "I like your smell". I wouldn't have done this when I was younger, but I decided the best response was to sniff him back like an animal and growl. Can't remember if I was ovulating or not, but it was definitely funny.
These days, we hear a lot about the “masculinity crisis” and how to help men. But psychologist Thomas Jefferys, Ph.D., who writes about men’s inner lives, drawing on his clinical work and his role as founder of a men’s retreat center in Upstate New York, United States, says that over the years, he’s met plenty of men who already know what they need to do: tell the truth, face the pain, set the boundary, and stop running, but are still struggling.
The problem, according to Jefferys, isn’t insight. It’s action. Or rather, a lack of it.
“What stops them isn’t ignorance. It could be things like anger, guilt, some shame ... I’ve come to think of this pattern as what I call the Shakespeare Complex.”
“In Shakespeare’s plays, the audience usually knows what must be done long before the final act arrives. The tension in the story isn’t what the protagonist should do; it’s whether he has the courage, clarity, or inner freedom to do it. The drama lives in the delay between awareness and action. Men today live in that same space,” the psychologist explains his analogy.
#13
Just Biology Fellas
#15
What
Howl's sleeping castle 15 hours ago
Ok, I don't think I am going to continue. This was top 8 and I assume my limit
Jefferys believes men are not so much confused as they are conflicted. “They know what is required of them, but are held back by unexamined beliefs—about responsibility, misplaced loyalties, masculinity, failure, and the cost of choosing themselves.”
“Anger often masks sadness. Guilt disguises fear. Shame convinces them that movement itself is dangerous. And anything that even hints at shame is usually on their do-not-examine list,” the psychologist says. “So they distract, minimize, work harder, drink more, stay busy, mislead themselves, or just go silent. What appears as endurance is often just disconnection over time.”
#16
Til Eating Sushi Is A Feminine Trait
#17
If You Find Yourself A Wife You’ll Turn Into A Woman
#18
Because All Guys Are Insecure?
#19
Hey Guys Is It Gay To Have Eyelashes
Jefferys says awareness without movement becomes its own form of suffering.
Over time, that suffering can pull men into resignation, resentment, self-defeating behaviors, or desperation.
“For some, indifference follows right behind desperation. And what begins as hesitation quietly becomes a way of life,” he says. “This is not a failure of character. It is a failure of awareness, the kind that comes from never fully excavating the causes, beliefs, loyalties, and fears shaping a man’s choices.”
#20
Masculine Peak
Yayheterogeneity 14 hours ago
Don't be fooled. If someone talks like this to you, they are toxic and don't want your best. Everyone deserves happiness and at some point we'll all have to endure some suffering.
#21
R/Feminism Is Something Else
#22
That's Not How DNA Or Anything Works
#23
Feminine Act?
Jefferys thinks society shouldn’t tell men what to do. Instead, it would be much better if we all allowed them to look honestly at their hesitation, the beliefs that sustain it, and the quiet forces that keep them frozen at thresholds they are meant to cross. Everyone has the right to decide for themselves how they work, man or woman.
#24
Boys Don’t Cry
#25
The Call Is Coming From Inside The Prison Cell
#26
Fellas, Is It Gay To Be Creative?
Grace Sssssss 14 hours ago
Who the hell ever came up with the notion that men are "non-emotional"???
#27
“The System Is Literally Created To Make Everyman Rich!”
#28
Guys Who Don't Want To Date Single Mothers Are Secretly Gay?
Floeckchen 14 hours ago
...or maybe they just don't want to take responsibility for a child that isn't their own?
#29
Crying At Your Wedding Is Gay Now, Fellas
#30
FBI Open Up
#31
Nope I’m Leaving Bye
#32
This Is Straight Up Homophobic And Not Funny Even If Satire
#33
Lighthearted Post To Make Fun Of
#34
Does This Belong Here? I Really Don't Know Anymore
Elladine DesIsles 14 hours ago
It's the layers! Anyone else wondering how much DNA ogres have?
#35
Is This Accurate?
Did I say that out loud? 5 hours ago
Unfortunately, I wouldn't be at all surprised if this was the case for some men.
#37
If U Act Like A Dad She Failed As Wife
#38
Can Confirm I Am Always Preoccupied With Empire (Rise Of Kingdoms)
#39
Guys, Is It Gay To Care About Your Appearance?
#40
Saw On R/Starterspack Thought It Belonged Here As Well
Kathrin Pukowsky 14 hours ago
Gawd, now I'm thinking of my dad's cooking. I mean, sure, he had some memorable missteps, like the vanilla yogurt for the salad dressing, but overall he was a really good cook.
#41
Pretty Sure That's Just Genetics
#42
Wow, Just Wow
Floeckchen 14 hours ago
tell that to a man in a car when he thinks, that someone took advantage of him...
#43
The Classic "Men Can't Be Friends With Women"
#45
Is It Gay To Love Your Female Wife?
Gaerwing 14 hours ago
He just really hates that despite all his posturing, and working out, and "looksmaxxing" and all the effort he has put into making his entire life about women (while pretending he isn't completely ruled by his little cocktail sausage), despite all that... Women still don't want anything to do with him.
#46
Cause You Know What All Men Find Attractive
Annik Perrot 13 hours ago
They're not doing it for you, they're doing it for themselves. Can't say I find this pretty, but whatever floats their boat!
#47
As Long As There’s No Stds, It Really Doesn’t Matter
Kristiina Männiste 13 hours ago
Well. The only time I got turned down by a man was, when I told him I vas a virgin. So.... They kinda do, but not in the way incels tell you😂
#48
Her Mind vs. His (Apparently)
Kristiina Männiste 13 hours ago
Im sorry, my mind is just d***h, dragons, dust, diet, dandelions and tentacles.
#49
Another Person Expecting Guys To Always Be Unfaithful
#51
Fellas, Is It Gay To Sleep With Your Wife?
#52
Not How Guys Or Girls Work???
#53
"Why Does Nobody Take The Sexualization Of Men Seriously :((("
#55
We're Made To Protect There To Birth And Nuture
Kristiina Männiste 13 hours ago
Nope I wont😆 I dont like duties. I like freedom! But yall welcome to have your fun back in 1880. I dont mind! Heck I believe every person should have the freedom to live in the historic era they desire to.
#56
That’s… Not How Basic Biology Works
#57
Woman Thinks Some Pretty Colours Will Ruin A Man
#58
I Don't Even Know What To Say About This. Incredible
Floeckchen 11 hours ago
Isn't "not feeling compassion towards those in need of protection" a point on the psychopath test?
#59
Yeahhh…. That’s Not Really How That Works
#60
Guys Are Responsible For How Women Present Themselves
#61
If You Love Someone Then You’re Weaaakk
#62
Like This Ain’t Cool Yo. Clearly Some Problems About Gender We Have To Work Out. Short Men Are Born Short. It’s Genetic. It’s Ok. Relax
#64
The Boys Do Not Know
#65
Uhh... No? Because I Genuinely Don't Listen To Taylor Swift
#66
Men Don’t Have Hips, Apparently…
Did I say that out loud? 14 hours ago
If I don't have hips, how do I walk? And where tf is that pain coming from?
#67
Yoo Being Gay Is Misogynistic Now
Fungus John 14 hours ago
looking like that you'd think she would be appreciative of the gays. well, at least the ones with poor eyesight.
#68
Since When Does Anyone Put Emojis In Folder Names?
#69
Single Men Can’t Even Have Dogs Now
#70
I Guess Men Are Supposed To Watch Horror Movies With Their Faces Like Squidward’s House
#71
Found This Interesting Claim. Might Also Be Ableist As Well
#72
Men Can You Control Your Lust Long Enough To Not Talk To Women
#73
Men Are Only Masculine When They're Dehydrated
#74
Tell Me You Don't Understand Men Without Saying It Directly
#76
Lady, I Just Want To Play My Video Game
Fungus John 14 hours ago
but the story in bloodborne, and all soulsborne games, is intentionally vague and needs to be pieced together using external media. it's like saying "this stupid man couldn't take in the story of Finnegans Wake, I had to explain it to him". pretentious as all hell.
#77
Apparently, A Husband Cannot Be Handsome And Smart. That'd Be Just Too Much
Floeckchen 11 hours ago
Funnily the illiterate ones are more likely to feel they are always right
#80
Definitely Not How Guys Work
Elladine DesIsles 13 hours ago
There are plenty of misogynistic gay men. I even know a misogynistic Trans man.
#81
Guys Are Never Single
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What do you think ?
London Paris 13 hours ago
As a sixty year old man . . . . .d**n but the last two generations of the male population have produced some utterly bizarre, pathetic and mind numbingly stupid 'men' . . . .we still have schools right? im SURE we still have schools where kids go to learn stuff so how come we have so many 'men' that are utterly baffled by the female body and see women as a seperate species and what's with this bizarre fascination, obsession almost, with being secretly gay? Just go and be gay and go be the real you: it really is super okay to be gay. Go, go find some d*** and ENJOY yourself, have fun and stop being so annoying . . . . .its the 21st century: have fun.
Floeckchen 11 hours ago
Thoughts like this have always existed but were in most cases bar room banter. Sadly the village idiots have found their plattforms on the internet and are annoyingly loud, because they are a******d to attention.
Load More Replies...
Classified 14 hours ago
Wow. Just wow. Sometimes when you don't want to believe there are people who think like this exists, here they are. I wonder if they stay in a perpetual state of judgmental ignorance? 🤔 🙄
London Paris 13 hours ago
As a sixty year old man . . . . .d**n but the last two generations of the male population have produced some utterly bizarre, pathetic and mind numbingly stupid 'men' . . . .we still have schools right? im SURE we still have schools where kids go to learn stuff so how come we have so many 'men' that are utterly baffled by the female body and see women as a seperate species and what's with this bizarre fascination, obsession almost, with being secretly gay? Just go and be gay and go be the real you: it really is super okay to be gay. Go, go find some d*** and ENJOY yourself, have fun and stop being so annoying . . . . .its the 21st century: have fun.
Floeckchen 11 hours ago
Thoughts like this have always existed but were in most cases bar room banter. Sadly the village idiots have found their plattforms on the internet and are annoyingly loud, because they are a******d to attention.
Load More Replies... Classified 14 hours ago
Wow. Just wow. Sometimes when you don't want to believe there are people who think like this exists, here they are. I wonder if they stay in a perpetual state of judgmental ignorance? 🤔 🙄
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